neverlosemyfocusBefore she let her panic overwhelm her common sense, Siri forced herself to find some scraps of calm and THINK. She knew Obi-Wan, knew him better than anyone else. He wouldn't let her go through this alone. He would insist that they go before the Council together. There would be no way to hide this. She would begin to show, eventually, and they would sense the child growing within her long before that.
They would be expelled.
And she couldn't let that happen. Not to Obi-Wan. He was the best Jedi she knew. There might not be a way for her to avoid the punishment herself... but she could at least protect him. So instead of contacting Obi-Wan, having him come to her quarters in the Temple to tell him what had happened... she packed what few belongings she had, and made her way to the Council chambers. She stood before them solemnly, head held high, and did what needed to be done.
When she left their chambers... she was no longer a Jedi. She could feel Adi's concern, and it hurt to turn her back and walk away. But she had to.
As much as that hurt... it hurt far worse to leave the Temple without saying goodbye to Obi-Wan. She just couldn't risk it. Couldn't take the chance that he would sense her lies, sense that there was more to her leaving than what she was saying. And he wouldn't let it lie, wouldn't let her leave until he knew why. Until he knew the TRUTH. He couldn't. Not this time.
So she left.
It was easy enough to get mask her Force signature on Coruscant; with so many people she could get lost without fear of Obi-Wan tracking her down. She could take a little time and... try to figure out what to do. She felt... lost. And she was scared. Terrified. She didn't know what to do. She'd always been a Jedi. After the Order, after having a purpose for so long... she would need something else. Something to fill her hours. There was time before her... state would force her to take it easy. She thought. She hoped. She wasn't very far along.
So there had to be time.
Siri found she had a knack for private investigation, and she built herself a decent reputation. Although not enough for it to get back to the Order. She made sure of that. She couldn't give Obi-Wan any way to find her. But that was how she became friends with Bail Organa and his wife, Breha. In the process of working a case they hired her for, she came to grow quite close to them. Enough to trust them with the truth.
Bail, of course, figured out who the father was immediately; he'd only seen them together a few times, he said, but he knew right away there was something between them. They swore to keep her secret. And Breha, thank the Force, took her under her wing. It was them that helped to keep the panic at bay, kept her from being completely overwhelmed.
Later, when her pregnancy had advanced enough where she was showing, and could no longer continue her work as a private investigator, and no longer felt comfortable remaining on Coruscant, they invited her to Alderaan to stay with them. Stunned by their generosity, she took them up on their offer. She was even more stunned by them giving her rooms in the private wing of their palace. That one simple gesture, marking her as family, meant more to her than they could ever know.
Alderaan became somewhere she thought of as home. Life there was... as peaceful as it could be with the fighting going on. It was difficult, not being there, fighting, defending the Republic... but that wasn't her life anymore. She had other things to protect, now.
Like her daughter.
Larel Tachi had her mother's eyes... and her father's hair and smile. And Siri absolutely adored her. The depth of her adoration, her love, stunned her; she'd only ever felt something this deeply once before (and it had, in fact, led to her little girl's conception). When she began working as a private investigator again, Breha would often tend to the little girl. The Organa's became her adopted aunt and uncle.
She was happy. For the first time since she left the Order she was happy. But her past wouldn't stay behind her forever. She should have known that she couldn't hide forever.
Obi-Wan came to Alderaan.
She would know his Force signature anywhere, and feeling it again, after so long, took her breath away. And made her stomach sink. Kriff, how had he found her? Maybe it was a simple coincidence. Force, let it be a coincidence. Larel, even as young as she was, could sense her mother's upset, and clung tighter to her. Smoothing a hand over her daughter's auburn hair, she pressed a gentle kiss to her temple.
“He could be here to see Bail,” she murmured softly, trying to breathe. Let him be here to see Bail. Please.
She made her way through the halls of the Royal Palace, choosing the ones that were less travelled, suddenly thankful that she could sense him in the Force, and use that to try and avoid him. Unfortunately he could use his sense of her to find her.
And that made it clear that he wasn't there to see Bail, or Breha. Every move she made to avoid him he countered in order to find her.
“Kriff,” she hissed, voice low.
She couldn't breathe. Panic was bubbling in her chest; she'd tried so hard to avoid this. To avoid him. And now he was here. She didn't even know how he'd found her. She'd been so CAREFUL.
“Siri.”
Hearing her name from his lips broke her heart all over again, and she spun towards the sound of his voice. She froze at the sight of him, the first time she'd seen him in years, her breath catching in her throat.
He was just... staring at her, like he'd seen a ghost. There was something in his eyes, a look she hadn't seen before, and she couldn't put it into words. But it made her shiver.
“Obi-Wan.”